hate it.

Did u see that ? that is how i feel right now. Sometimes, its nothing. I hate this feels, its like killing me, erghh,, damn it! why are you so mean to me? Do you care about my feeling? I kept thinking nonsense and only me knows it. I really really don't want the others know about my private stuff. But, i need somebody to be my shoulder. I really really need he/she. Do i have to tell the person that i love, that his/her behaviour really really hurt me? Yeah, i'm smiling but inside i'm dying. Fake smile can hide anything, can lies everyones. Life is so disappoint me today. errghh,, nothing can i do. Its hurt a lott,, stop doing that to me. Please! I'm not gonna tell you about this but i hope you know it. It sucks, right? I'm alive but dying. =.='  All i want is be the most lucky girl in the world. Got the straight As in SPM and gonna be a teacher and find a really really suitable husband for me, for my life, for my family, for my lovely parents and a caring father for my childrens. :) thats my dream. But, to get the best, i must try and do the best for my life. But.. how? how i wanna achieve the best for my life? i am such a lazy ass. bbrrrr~ the lazy one as could as im. hOhO.. And,, the another thing that make me suffer a lot is SCHOOL+ SUCKS CLASSMATE,, i really really hate it. Sometimes they make me cry. Just all alone. Am i have somebody to be my shoulder? When i get upset, there is nobody besides me. why? why? why? I know i just an ordinary girl who don't have anything, hmmmmm.. boys always love the beauty one. Who do you think you are? I have failed. Fail about guys. I am too easy to fall in love with guys who is care about me. Shit ! Why i'm so stupid. I don't regret about my past but i regret because i had fall in love with the wrong persons. Now,, i think my heart is crying because missing somebody actually hurting myself. I know it, but i keep doing it. Its come naturally. And, i'm started to cry again. AAaaaAAa, i don't want this happen again. Enough for once. Fullstop.